Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Woolly Mammoth: Coming To A City Near You... To Eat You!

Does that look like what you found in last night's dinner? Or maybe clogged in your tub drain? Perhaps a birds nest? Or a Woolly Mammoth hairball?
Well, if you guessed the latter, you are right!
Scientists say that it may be possible to resurrect this extinct species by decoding ancient DNA found in hair (or hairballs). While this is not the first attempt to bring back this Ice Age beast, advanced DNA sequencing machines may prove to be more worthy than impregnating a female elephant with some frozen mammoth sperm. The best part of this whole thing is that it will only cost $10 Million to complete this task (where the hell do they get that kind of estimate anyway?). Unless this Holy Mammoth can bring our slowing economy back onto its feet, I think we have better things to spend our money on. Actually, maybe we can auction off the Mammoth's Ivory Tusks for $11 Million on E-bay and make a profit!
Darn it Obama, is this the change that you promised?

If this type of fringe science works, what will become of our planet? Humans playing God has never sounded like a great idea, and this is definitely one of those times we should leave this mammal extinct. Who knows how stable or manageable a living Woolly Mammoth would be, for all we know it could trample all over us or even fling us around with his huge tusks.
What's next, Dinosaurs? *Rawr!

Source: NY Times

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